fun for all
by Jack10
Summary: Lucs gets to work at the SGC.


Authors note: Several co workers of mine inspired this story. Sad to say we have no snakes to make it a more interesting day!

Lucas sat typing, trying to ignore the other techs currently "working". They were talking loud enough to derail his train of thought, which was saying a lot. He sighed loudly, hoping they would get the hint and shut the hell up already, but that only seemed to incite more vapid chatter. He looked at his computer, then at the group. He decided to work elsewhere; he knew Sam would forgive a new connection for the finished product.

He shut everything down, closed the lap top, then walked away without looking back. He paused a step away from the door, knowing the conversation would turn to him. He was not disappointed; the fat male of the group started in, with Catherine- the short haired one chiming in. She had liked him at first, but when he had shown more of an aptitude for working instead of flirting, she'd quickly lost interest. He wasn't being antisocial, just that Sam had asked him there, special military request, to fix a glitch and maybe even do an overhaul. If he was lucky, he'd make it a paying gig for the whole time the SeaQuest 2 was being built. He knew Sam would let him stay as long as he wanted, but he also wanted to be mentally busy.

He smiled as he walked, knowing the only office that would be safe to use. He entered Daniel's office, smiling as the linguist looked up.

"It's only 10, are they that bad already?"

Lucas rolled his eyes, and then sat his computer down. He mimed as he spoke in wonderful falsetto.

"My god! Did you see the new Jonas brother's poster?"

"Yeah! I can't bring it up online here! The computer blocks Jonas Brothers sites or anything to do with them!"

"We didn't download that much stuff!"

"They're just being mean blocking all non work stuff."

Daniel laughed. He did understand the crew he was dealing with. They were still an experimental group, to see if they would work out well. Some had done very well, updating and upgrading the program; they were in the level 16 lab. The others that had not faired as well were still on level 4 with pending jobs. All new people were stuck in there to gauge their competency. Lucas didn't know it yet, but he would have been in charge to the level 16 group, but his temp status made that hard to do. He had only been there 2 days and had improved Sam's system 10 fold. She had mentioned a raise for the kid; General O'neill okayed it when he saw the improvements.

"So you're saying the prattle is just too much for you?"

"Yes! Adults lusting after teenagers are normally called pedophiles!"

"They did lust after you."

"I've got a girlfriend, boyfriend; even Sam's cat is just too jealous for me to date one of them."

Daniel arched an eyebrow.

"Yes, I cover all bases. Straight, gay, whatever, I'm not available."

"I do understand. I normally claim Teal'c would not be amused if I chose to date."

Lucas smiled.

"Does it work?"

Daniel nodded.

"Normally."

Daniel motioned to the stool at the table. Lucas connected the various cables, then began typing. At first Daniel heard the rhythmic clacking, and then slowly tuned it out. He could handle Lucas sharing his office. He did his job and rarely bothered him with inane questions. Jack was getting better about not torturing him, but occasionally he just couldn't resist.

Two hours later, Daniel looked up to see Sam and Teal'c in his doorway. She was smiling at the scene in front of her. She blushed when she caught Daniel's attention. She walked in quietly, with Teal'c close behind. She nodded at the blonde across the room,

"He looks so serious over there."

"He looks like a young you. He's actually wearing your over shirt."

She looked over, focusing on the lettering, then she looked down at her shirt.

"I wondered why Mitchell kept looking at me in a weird way. They don't have any rank insignia, so I guess its ok."

"Samatha, should we not rouse him for the meal?"

"I guess so, but he may just want to keep working. We can also bring him something back."

No one noticed the typing had stopped or the mischievous blue eyes that were now trained on the group. He slowly got off the stool, and then stalked up behind the lone female. He found a stray hair at the base of her neck, and then very gently pulled it up. Sam scratched her head without looking around her. He repeated the gesture until she asked Daniel to see if she had anything in her hair. She saw the laughter brightening his eyes and the failed attempt at covering the smirk.

"Lucas!"

The answering snicker made her turn and grab at her cousin.

"You!"

He dodged easily enough.

"I had to do it. You looked so serene."

"Watch it, Carter."

He gave her a confused look. She nodded at his shirt, smiling as understanding set in. He posed, flattening the name across his chest.

"I wear it well. I will, however, trade you. You can keep the Wolenczak."

She smiled.

"Nah, we can both be Carters."

Daniel muttered something about the space time continuum collapsing. They just smiled, wrapping arms around waists.

"As per your earlier conversation, I'd love lunch. I know I can fit more jello in my mouth than Sam can."

"Bring it."

The group laughed as they left for the cafeteria. It would definitely be an interesting lunch.

Lunch passed with minimal carnage, with the exception of the jello, many bowls were sacrificed. Jack ended up winning the contest, though Daniel swore he cheated. The group parted to their separate ways, with Lucas following Daniel to his office. They walked down the hall each in their own musings. They returned to their previous seats and returned to work.

The peace lasted about an hour, before Daniel noticed a different cadence in the typing. It normally had a gentle rhythm; this was now staccato with different pauses. Finally he looked up when Lucas swore under his breath. The disgusted look made Daniel ask:

"What's wrong?"

"That idiot brunette is on the server, blocking access to the main I need. She and the Beavis are trying to find a way around the internet block."

"Ok, why?"

Lucas shook his head. "Probably to see if I'll come down there and kill them."

Lucas' eyes narrowed, and then he smiled most crudely.

"Frankenstein will be most monstrous today."

"Do I want to know?"

Lucas' face brightened and he smiled normally.

"Umm do you want plausible deniability? They say I look funny and make funny noises all the time on SeaQuest."

Daniel shrugged and continued to watch the boy type. He started typing in his normal smooth pace, punctured only with evil giggles that really shouldn't be coming from the innocent looking face. It only took 15 minutes, but Lucas did return to normal. He happily typed his code and hummed what suspiciously sounded like Queen's Another One Bites the Dust.

Curiosity finally got the better of Daniel.

"Ok, I give up, what did you do?"

Lucas smiled a most angelic smile.

"I only shared with everyone on the base, including email lists exactly where they were and what they were searching for. Oh, yeah, I also hacked their individual computers, changed the directories that they were hiding their stuff in to the top shared directory, and just for fun, every time they boot up, it plays the Smurf's theme."

Daniel laughed.

"All that in 15 minutes."

"Yup. I don't care that they waste time, but when they make it to where I can't do my job, then I have a problem with them."

Daniel nodded.

"I can agree with that. It is nice to be on a team where everyone does pull their own weight. We've got it together to the point that we don't get in each others way. It takes a long time to get the team dynamic working that fluidly."

"SeaQuest was that way. We'd just got it smoothed over when she had to be sacrificed to fix Lawrence's mistake."

Daniel smiled gently.

"It will get a new rhythm with the new people, but it can be harmonious. I bet it took time for everyone to learn each others quirks on the first tour."

"Yeah, I guess. I love working here, but it was nice on the ship, new places, reached easily by shuttle that had nice warm beaches."

Daniel laughed.

"Sam said something about a dolphin. She wanted Thor to meet him."

"Darwin is great. He's always ready to play, helps with experiments, great for just listening to rants."

Daniel honed in on the last statement. He knew the kid needed an outlet and a talking fish would help.

"I find writing in my journals helps. It does help when you know a lot of languages. Vala can occasionally distinguish some words."

"I've got a file on my personal drive that is sort of that way. You let Vala read your journal?"

"Not intentionally. She tends to pilfer to find something I need."

Lucas arched an eyebrow.

"Don't ask. She makes me crazy half the time. She can be worse than Jack ever thought to be. On a different note, if you do want someone to bounce ideas off of, I'm here."

Lucas smiled.

"Thanks. I keep that in mind. I do know it is a bad idea to use Teal'c in sparring practice."

"Yes. I promise not to kill you, Cam might be ok, he compensates for inexperience. Lou will also help build skill without just thumping you."

"Good to know."

"You wouldn't believe."

They laughed, then went back to the individual projects.

Several hours later, Sam came in, knocking softly. Both men looked up startled. She laughed at the expressions.

"Ready to go home?"

Lucas nodded, then stretched, cracking every joint in the process. Daniel cringed.

"That just sounded painful."

"Really? It felt great. I'll probably have Sam walk on my back when we get home. I didn't realize how long I'd been sitting."

Daniel laughed as he shook his head.

"Don't let Janet hear you say that, or she'd have a fit."

Lucas smiled knowingly.

"I've met her twice so far. She seems pretty nice, standard military doctor, but nice."

Sam looked over.

"What are the qualifications for a standard military doctor?"

"Medical or phd?"

"We'll go with medical first. I'll save phd for who gets to clean up dinner."

Lucas laughed.

"You on."

Daniel laughed, enjoying the interplay between cousins.

"Ok, standard military doctor is tough as nails, can be completely mean or compassionate, depending on the person. They are also snarky, have a demented sense of humor, and last but not least, can make the highest mucky muck low without trying."

The two SG1 members nodded. That was Janet, especially the last part. Pulling rank with her only proved to make her find the largest needle, somewhere around a 2 gauge, and put it someplace very painful when the offending person threatened the good of another patient. She was not afraid to send them out to specialists when it went beyond her knowledge, but she also fought long and hard to keep her people safe and healthy.

Sam looked at Lucas.

"Ok, you don't get kitchen duty for that one. How about we go for Chinese take out?"

Lucas smiled, "Sounds great, let's go. "

"Daniel, do you want to join us?"

"You two go ahead; I've got several more pages to do. Thanks for the offer, though."

They headed out, hitting Sam's lab just before they left. They strolled down the hall, almost making it to the elevator when the warning sirens started sounding and Sam's name was called over the PA system. Lucas followed Sam into the elevator, then into the control room. SG-1 was gathered with General O'Neill.

"What's happening, Sir?"

"Someone got into the gate system and managed to lock the iris in the open position."

Sam looked at Chuck, who was typing, occasionally looking at the screen. She walked over to a different station, logged in, and then started typing. Lucas looked over her shoulder, following her lines of code. He watched for awhile, then gasp.

"That idiot got into wrong system! She's trying to get around the internet block."

O'Neill looked sharply at Lucas.

"What?"

"User 56 is Roslyn. The internet is blocked for non work purposes. She's been trying to get around it all day. Now she's in the gate system."

"Carter, can you undo it?"

"Maybe, Sir, they have modified things I have to get around."

"Lucas, get them out of the system, cancel all their login privileges. "

Lucas sat down at the terminal between Sam and Chuck. He logged in as root, then began typing. The others around watched anxiously as the trio typed. They all muttered under their breath, which would have been funny had the situation not been so dire. Lucas shut them out of the system, then tried to help Sam without getting in the way. Suddenly the gate started moving, claxons started sounding. Chuck changed systems, checking to see the dial in address.

"No IDC, Sir, but it's coming from a goa'uld held planet."

"Great! Blast shield down! Marines! If it's not human, kill it!"

The last chevron locked, as the event horizon whooshed. The security camera showed a flash device rolling down the gate. Before anyone could yell a warning, the monitor flashed to static. SGC personnel moved to counter the attack. Teal'c shifted to cover Sam, Lucas, and Chuck. The fighting passed the control room door, gun fire and screams abounding. The control room was shut down, locking all the systems down. All the people running for hold positions. Sam and Lucas got separated in the melee. Daniel and Lucas ended up on Level 4, with a zat and P-90. They took out several Jaffa, sealing up passages as they went. They peered into a large meeting room, trying to blend as much as possible. The sight before them made both gasp. Jeremy was on the floor, wearing what could only be described as scary. The closest thought was a princess Leigha outfit, except on a really large, hairy male. Catherine was currently torturing him with a hand device. Roslyn was curled up in a ball on the floor, behind the guards. Lucas looked at Daniel. They managed to get outside room and away from any guards.

"Are we near any bleach?"

Daniel looked at him strangely.

"Why?"

"I think I'm going to have to bleach my eyes after that sight."

Daniel laughed. "It was rather strange."

Daniel clicked his radio.

"Um, we've managed to find two new goa'ulds on Level 4. They also have Jeremy being tortured by a hand device."

"Good, we'll be down as soon as we clear section 8. They seemed to nest here for some reason."

Lucas and Daniel snuck back to the conference room to monitor the situation. Jeremy was currently feeding Catherine grapes, while Roslyn glared.

"The slave will entertain me now."

Catherine glared at the other queen.

"He will when I say he does. Your strength is just gaining."

Roslyn raised her hand, flinging the serving tray and man into the wall.

"You will not overrule me again! You may have been made first, but that means nothing now."

Catherine laughed.

"You are only angry that your slave has not yet been found. You, wanting a weak male. Mine can run circle around him."

"He couldn't run if his life depended on it. He may have enough gravitational pull to make the Shova circle."

Gold eyes flashed as the guards near moved farther away. They had been warned this may happen. The sister symbiotes had already destroyed one world with their clashes.

The argument progressed, with more items thrown, typically aimed at Jeremy if Roslyn was throwing. The shields clashed, Jaffa moved to stay out of the fray. Daniel and Lucas edged farther away, while still trying to maintain a visual. Daniel's radio chirped twice, Jack was signaling he was close. They stayed down, motioning for the rest of the team and the marines to stay quiet. They could have probably screamed it, as the noise level in the room had reached a peak. Teal'c and Jack pulled out Gould flash grenades, rolling them opposite directions. The SGC group took cover, hearing the silence as testimony that the Queens were down. They moved in, weapons drawn. The room was filled with bodies strewn about, unmoving. The marines began gathering up the unconscious Jaffa. The queens were heavily manacled, with all Gould devices removed. The Jaffa were rounded up, and placed in a holding cell on Level 9. The rest of the Jaffa were rounded up, either wounded or dead.

Lucas looked at the people around him.

"Where's Sam?"

Teal'c looked up.

"She is currently fixing the system. The iris closed."

"Ok, just wondering. Does she need any help?"

Jack clicked his radio.

"Carter, need any more help on the computers?"

"Lucas?"

"No, I volunteered to help."

"Sir?"

"Yes, Lucas."

"Sure, send him up. I'm almost done, but there are various systems that need back ups started."

Teal'c led the way, clearing the locked areas as they went. He left the two scientists to their work. He had Jaffa to attend to.

2000 hrs

Sam looked up and stretched. The sound of her back popping made Lucas look up. She smiled at him, enjoying the peace of working around him.

"Ready to go home and kill off a pizza?"

"Sans closes way too early."

"True, there's always tomorrow night."

"Do I have to fill out any reports?"

"Did you fire any shots?"

"Yes."

"Then, yes you do. I'll give you the standard form. General O'neil will probably just glance at it, just like all the rest. Daniel will get to do the full standard report."

Lucas arched an eyebrow.

"Admit it; you have a template form for most reports."

Sam shrugged her shoulders.

"Whatever works."

Lucas nodded. "I can agree with that."

They collected their gear, and actually made it to the car without being called back. Lucas drove, while Sam enjoyed the scenery.

"I never get to appreciate the view. I'm normally too busy with schedules and work to notice anything smaller than a deer in the road."

Lucas nodded. "It is a nice drive. I'm used to rolling out of bed and going to work. No commute, no traffic. I also don't have to wear a uniform, so I can be as casual as I want."

"We're normally in BDU's. It's seldom we have any visitors to dress up for."

"I can handle the BDU's. They're comfy, and I don't have to wash them myself."

Sam nodded. It was nice to have some things done for her, like food, clothing, clean up staff. She did remember them every Christmas with giant boxes of chocolates.

They drove on, getting an all topping pizza, and getting home. They ate in relaxed quiet, letting the days events die with the day. Lucas looked up questioningly.

"What's going to happen to the techs?"

Sam looked over.

"Well, the ones with the symbiotes will have to have the symbiotes by the tokra, then the techs will probably be sent to a facility we have just for people who have experienced that phenomenon. It's not too bad. They'll be in years of therapy, even if the symbiote went willingly. Jeremy will have to have similar treatment at the same facility. They'll be discharged and go on to bother someone else."

"So, no chance they'll be coming back?"

"No, especially after the chaos they caused. If they had not been taken as hosts, they would have been in jail."

Lucas nodded.

"I hate to see them hurt, but I really didn't like anyone of them."

Sam sighed.

"Some people are put on this Earth just to piss you off. You can't kill them, but you can't work with them either."

Lucas nodded.

"We had several like that on SeaQuest. It was a concept I never understood; expecting to slack all the time, but still get paid."

"We were both raised with the theory that if you do it, you do it right."

"Very true. Ben's a schemer, but he also did his job."

Sam looked at him quizzically.

"He had to have certain trading abilities to be a supply and morale officer."

"Oh, ok, he wasn't scheming all the time, just 80% of it."

Lucas laughed.

Sam looked up at the clock, then sighed.

"Well, kiddo, I have to get some sleep, we have to be at the mountain at 0800."

Lucas nodded in agreement and then put the remaining pizza away. Sam cleared the table, putting the dishes in the dish washer.

The night ended more peacefully than it had began, with the exception for two former techs that were now screaming obscenities at each other in a language they'd never spoken before. The goa'ulds currently in their heads were trying to erase all joy, hence they tortured the minds with images of the young boys these freaks liked being slowly roasted on a spit. It made the goa'ulds laugh giddily inside while each blaming the other for the failure to take the SGC. Catherine screamed at Roslyn, that at least she wasn't Harmony.

The guards on duty turned back to their magazines, the two in the cells were only snake heads. They would be dealt with appropriately.

Author's notes: The Gould are a race of serpent like parasites that burrow into your neck and take over control of the host body. They have a deep voice and their eyes flash gold.

A Goa'uld hand device is a piece of hand jewelry used by the Goa'uld to control force fields, torture, or heal. It spans the hand with a gem in middle that is actually a control crystal.

A flash device looks like a magic 8 ball that emits a flash of energy that incapacitates those facing the eye side.

SGC- stargate command

BDU-basic daily uniform

IDC-code every member of a gate traveling team must have to get back to earth.

Stargate-ring device that connects wormholes for travel.

Iris- titanium alloy shield that opens and closes to restrict entrance to Earth's gate.

Lucas Wolenczek- From SeaQuest, crossed here as Sam's cousin.

Sam Carter-Original member of SG-1, brilliant physicist.

Daniel Jackson-original member of SG-1, archeologist, linguist.

Jack O'neill- original leader SG-1, now general for SGC.

Cameron Mitchell-current leader of SG-1, standard military

Teal'c-original member SG-1, alien, also known by name Shova(traitor) by the Gould.

Chuck-gate dialing tech.

Ben Kreig- SeaQuest 1st season character, morale and supply officer.

Symbiote- Gould before it takes a host.

Tokra-Part of the Goa'uld race that doesn't take humans as slaves or hosts. The person must willingly want to blend with the symbiote.


End file.
